


The Lost and the Lonely

by tmwillson3



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Labyrinth Fusion, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Background Relationships, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Death, Decapitation, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Kink, Leather Kink, Minor Armitage Hux/Rose Tico, Minor Rey/Strunk for a second, Rey Needs A Hug (Star Wars), Riding Crops, Some backstory before the actual Labyrinth events, Violence, slowish burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 10:21:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29774721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tmwillson3/pseuds/tmwillson3
Summary: On Rey's ninth birthday, she made a wish, and an old woman gave her a special book, titled The Labyrinth. It would shape her life until one stormy night, she made a wish...Then her whole world was turned upside down.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 6
Kudos: 21
Collections: The 50 Shades of Rey





	The Lost and the Lonely

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the mods for putting on this collection! I present Rey the fiesty heroine as one of my favorites, Sarah Williams from Labyrinth. I love Labyrinth dearly, so this AU was eventually going to happen. It's been 5 years since we lost the shining star of David Bowie, but he still continues to inspire me every day. All the chapter titles and songs referenced are something I've heard him sing. 
> 
> A few upfront things: yes, Rey starts as 9, but nothing will happen until she's legal. I want to show how she comes to the point of wishing away her friends before we get to the good things. For a few chapters, we'll alternate POVs showing Rey growing up and Ben as he begins to rule. Flashbacks are in italics. Also, based on what I've read and researched, the fae are used to violence. There's nothing graphic here, but if you feel my tags aren't enough, please let me know.
> 
> A huge thanks to [Andrina_Nightshade](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andrina_Nightshade/pseuds/Andrina_Nightshade) for looking over this to make sure that everything sounds British enough. Also, many, many thanks to [WinglessOne](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinglessOne/pseuds/WinglessOne) for this lovely moodboard!

Once upon a time, in an old, British orphanage far, far away, there was a girl. 

A girl who had been given certain powers, or so she liked to believe. Her name was Rey Williams. She once had parents, but when they abandoned her at an orphanage, her world was turned upside down. The five-year-old wailed and was inconsolable for weeks. Not a single one of the kids had any pity for her, though, for they had all been dealt similar lots in life.

Rey, however, refused to accept this as her life.

“It’s not fair!” she cried as she stared at the front porch, refusing to do chores. Her three chestnut buns bobbed as she pressed her hands and nose to the frigid glass. The paint-splattered window panes and ancient rotting wood separating each pane were barely noticed as rain drizzled softly upon the object of Rey’s constant attention. “I didn’t ask for this! My parents are going to come for me any second!” 

They never did. Every day, she sat on the threadbare window seat cushion with a rough, woolen blanket covering her knees, hiding behind the thick, floor-length window curtains. The maroon color and dreary weather fitted young Rey’s mood perfectly as she waited impatiently for the storms in her life to pass. 

Fear of rejection and abandonment churned in her stomach until anxiety about her future crept in. The constant taunts of the other kids made her cling to her belief stubbornly, trying to bury the ball of fear and loneliness that gripped her, but after a year, she realized that her parents weren’t coming back for her. 

That was the day she ran outside to the park. Tears streaked her cheeks as her thin-soled shoes splashed in puddles, and no one outside would ever know that she was grieving. She had never felt more alone. 

When she returned back to the orphanage, she was picked on yet again and forced to do the chores of older kids. She hated them, hated the head of the orphanage, hated the orphanage, but most of all, she hated that she wasn’t good enough. That she wasn’t worth someone’s love, so she put up with the misery, telling all and sundry just how unfair it all was as she did what she was told.

“It’s not fair!” she shouted whenever the kids stole her meager portion of dinner and everyone turned a blind eye. 

“It’s not fair!” she said, fists pounding against the door that locked her into a dark closet because she was being a crybaby at school. “I don’t deserve this.” 

“It’s not fair!” she insisted when kids in the schoolyard took her dog-eared books and said she was nothing.

And yet again, she protested to her teacher, “It’s not fair! They take all my supplies, so I can’t do the homework.”

“I don’t care about your excuses, Rey. You could be a good student if you applied yourself,” said the elderly Lor San Tekka. “You’ve got a good head for numbers, and it’s being wasted.”

All of her teachers were similar to him, and since she lived in the small town of Jakku, all the kids knew that she had been abandoned. She made her way in the world, friendless and without the slightest bit of sympathy shown. 

The first time she was shown a little kindness was on her ninth birthday. On that magical day, she was escorted into town to pick out one gift for herself, and she chose a book. Rey walked into the tiny bookshop that smelled of leather and worn pages with the head of the orphanage, an old, rotund man by the name of Unkar Plutt.

“You can choose one book, and one book only, girl,” he told her as the little bell over the door rang. “You have fifteen minutes to find a book.”

“Oi! Fifteen minutes, and only one book? That’s not fair!” screamed Rey, cheeks turning red in indignation. “Every other child gets a big, expensive item--”

“You get one item; you chose a book. End of discussion,” grumbled Plutt. He lowered his considerable girth to get to her eye level. “If you don’t go and choose a book right now, I’m taking you home without a gift.”

“Unkar Plutt!” called a diminutive woman with coke-bottle glasses. She plodded toward the pair.

Plutt swore and looked around nervously before waving awkwardly. “Oh boy. Who’s this? I’ve never seen her here before.”

“What seems to be the trouble here? I’m Maz,” said the woman with a wrinkled, yet kind, face. “The usual owner is away for a few ticks.”

“Nothing is wrong,” declared Plutt, glaring at Rey to make her stay quiet. 

Maz glanced between the pair, face barely moving before she nodded. “Very well. I assume you need something.” Her eyes darted to Rey’s. “Desperately.”

“It’s my birthday!” chirped Rey, her hair eternally in the same three buns that her parents had favored on her. Her hazel eyes got big and pleading. “I wish for a book. My own book, not a hand-me-down, tattered one that everyone will steal,” she explained, not a bit of quavering in her voice. “A special book, one that will take me far away from this terrible place.” Pausing a moment, she mumbled, “So I don’t feel so alone.”

Maz’s whole face lit up. “Then I have just the selection for you, child. Let’s get to it.”

Rey trotted obediently behind the unknown woman past countless piles of books that lined the floor-to-ceiling, wooden shelves that groaned under the weight of books filling every nook and cranny. In the far back, past all the faded rugs and squeaky floorboards, lay the children’s section and the young adult section. Rey practically stuck her nose against every book she could lay her greedy hands on, reading each title and summary. After finishing one row of kids books, she was dissatisfied with how simple the books were, so she switched to the young adult ones at her eye level. Those, however, were a little too old for her. 

She felt like Goldlilocks trying to find the perfect book. She poured over the volumes, looking for something that would catch her eye, but nothing ever did. Soon, she had gone through all five shelves -- with the help of a stepladder -- of each section, with nothing she wanted. As she groaned in frustration, she stomped her foot and sank to the floor.

“It’s not fair,” she wailed, palms covering her eyes.

“What’s wrong, child?” asked Maz. 

“I can’t find a book I want. I’ve looked  _ everywhere _ ,” bemoaned Rey, one glassy eye peeking out to meet the short woman’s bespectacled face.

To Rey’s shock, this woman didn’t treat her with sarcasm or laughter. Instead, she knelt in front of Rey and gave her a hug. 

“There, there, Rey. That’s okay. You have good taste in books.”

“I’m not so sure,” replied Rey, squeezing the woman back. “I’ve read  _ everything  _ in this section.”

“Everything?" Maz wrinkled her nose, voice rising. "Even the ones on the ground?” She pulled back and reached blindly into a pile of young adult books on the floor. When she brought her hand back, she held a red, leatherbound book that looked like new. 

“Well, maybe not those, but they have too many big words in them for me,” said Rey, shaking her head sadly. “It looks pretty, but--”

“Look at me, child,” interrupted Maz, peering at the girl who yanked her head up at once. “If you live long enough, you see the same eyes in different people. I’m looking at the eyes of a girl who wants to escape.” 

Rey gasped as the woman stood. “How did you know?” she asked, standing up. “Everyone treats me poorly.”

“I wish it were only you, child, who were treated thusly, but there are many such. One even in this book I’m holding,” said Maz, offering her the book. “You just may find someone here who is like you more than you realize.” Her eyes got soft. “Someone else who is just as lost and lonely.”

Rey’s eyes bugged out at the thought of finding a friend within the pages of the book. “What’s it about?”

Maz placed the book in front of her, its title in gold leaf proclaiming it to be _The_ _Labyrinth._ “Open it and see for yourself, Rey. It's a special book, not one I show to just anyone."

Rey stared at the book, fascinated. The closer it got to her, the more it felt like it was calling to her, begging her to read it. It was crazy to imagine, and yet she barely restrained her hands from taking it. "Why me?" 

She didn't see the grin that spread across Maz's face. "Because I can tell. Sometimes you choose the book, and sometimes the book chooses you. This time, it's a mutual choosing."

Rey jerked her face up. "What does that mean?"

"Read it for yourself and see," offered Maz, dangling the book in front of her. "Do you want it?"

Rey bit her lip. "Yes, but--"

"Then take it."

Summoning her courage, Rey reached out. As soon as her fingertips latched onto the leather, her vision blurred, and she saw a majestic castle bursting with natural light. However, she was directed to a hallway shrouded in shadow. A boy appeared at the end of the hallway. She started toward him, and the world turned inside out, causing her to trip and fall. 

She reached out to the boy for help, but he disappeared right after saying, "I'll come back, Precious. I promise."

As she fell, she landed on her butt, the book clutched in her hand. Blinking her eyes, Rey was confused where she was at first and why glitter was falling like snow around her.

"There you are," said Maz, smirking as she watched the glitter catch the light and blanket the floor.

"What  _ was _ that?" asked Rey, searching for the tall spires of the airy castle.

"It seems the book called to you," said Maz, helping her up. 

"It did," agreed Rey with certainty. She wanted to find the castle again, and the boy. "I want this book."

"Good." Maz pointed at a large, microfiber armchair next to a fireplace. "Go over there and read it. I think you need it."

Rey started walking, then halted just as suddenly. She whirled to face her friend. "But what about Unkar? I must have been here at least an hour already."

"You've been here two hours, and you deserve more on your birthday. I wouldn't worry about him, if I were you," whispered Maz with a wink. "He's distracted for now." She nudged Rey toward the empty fireplace. "Go read."

Rey did just that. 

Her thin keds made a sound on each board she stepped on, and she sunk into the well-loved armchair immediately. She wiggled to the back of it, embracing its warmth as the worn, shale cloth rolled smoothly across the exposed skin of her legs below her shorts. Cuddling against the back and arms of the chair, Rey tucked in her legs and ran her hand along the cover, taking a moment to breathe in the deep, leather smell that immediately comforted her. 

As soon as she opened the book, though, she was transported. Lost in another world. Her concerns about school evaporated, and her fear of being punished on her birthday disappeared. Her rumbling stomach was forgotten, now fed by something else. 

Anyone could tell a story, but few possessed that rare gift to capture the reader's attention and transform the simple words into something moving and poetic. Rey's mind and heart were captured as soon as she met Sarah, someone who understood her plight. Someone else who was alone and had an unfair life. Sarah had said one thing she hadn't meant to, made one small wish for the goblins to take away her halfbrother, and she was punished cruelly for it. 

She wasn't sure what she loved more: that Sarah had been given certain powers, or that she defeated the evil Goblin King that stood for everything wrong in her life. 

Besides that, Rey was taken to another world, to a world of magic and fantasy that she yearned to visit. She didn't see the same castle from her vision, but she did see the castle beyond the Goblin City, the Goblin King's castle at the center of the Labyrinth. She heard the rectangular stones that Sarah crossed as she navigated through the Labyrinth within the thirteen hours allotted to her, and she hated the Bog of Eternal Stench, the most feared place in all the Labyrinth. 

When Rey finally finished the thrilling tale, she was sad to see it end. She had found the tiniest seed of hope for her life, and she treasured it. Closing the book, she hugged it to her chest.

"What did you think, child?" asked Maz, approaching slowly.

"I want to read it again! I love it! I never want to read another book besides this one," declared Rey, getting to her feet. "May I please keep this one?"

Maz grinned. "You may. Let's have your guardian pay for it." She motioned toward the front. "This way, dear." As they walked, the matronly woman asked, "What do you think? Is it a real story or place?"

Rey's eyes became big as saucers at the thought. Instantly, she hoped it was. "Yes! It has to be. I want to go to the Underground and see the Labyrinth." As Maz stepped behind the counter, Rey gently placed the book down and leaned on her elbows with a curious look. "What do you think the Labyrinth is like?"

"Much dirtier than you realize."

The women's no-nonsense, simple answer convinced Rey immediately that she had to be right. Nose wrinkling, Rey asked, "Is it because of the glitter?"

The older woman laughed heartily. "That contributes, yes. Mostly, it's the goblins that make constant messes. They keep so many chickens, and their feathers get  _ everywhere. _ "

Rey nodded slowly with a gaping mouth, fascinated by this information. They used to keep chickens at the orphanage, so it was easy to imagine that smell. She was about to ask how Maz knew all that when their little bubble was popped rudely.

"There you are, girl. I've been looking all over the whole shop for you. You better have a book by now," said Plutt, pleased when Maz began ringing up the book. 

As soon as he paid and walked toward the door, Maz placed the book in the store's signature brown, paper bag before looking in all directions. Satisfied that the coast was clear, she approached Rey. "If the children see this, they're likely to steal it from you, right?"

Rey's lower lip trembled as she nodded. "They take  _ everything _ , especially my food and books."

"Well, they're not going to take this. It's yours," said Maz, pulling out a small, burlap sack from her pockets. She placed the book inside it, tightened the drawstring, and handed it to Rey. "It's a special bag someone gave me; I think you need it more than I do. It'll protect your book."

Rey surged forward and hugged her, grateful to have found a friend in the world. "Thank you."

"This is a very special book. Not everyone is worthy." Maz knelt in front of her. "Words have meaning, and not everything is as it seems. Remember that."

Rey's buns shook excitedly. "I will!" With that, she took the bag and followed her guardian home. 

It was another hot summer day for the summer solstice, and Plutt was huffing and puffing to get back as soon as he could to the drafty orphanage. Rey’s tiny legs had to sprint to catch up to him, but nothing could break the grin that was plastered on her face. 

“I picked the best book ever! It’s magical!” exclaimed Rey to her companion. “Thank you!”

“You better be grateful for how much I paid for it,” he grumbled, not glancing at her. “What’s it about?”

Her face lit up. “It’s about a girl named Sarah whose life is terrible until she wishes her baby stepbrother away. After that, she goes on a big adventure to solve the Labyrinth, making friends with a dwarf named Hoggle, a large, hairy beast named Ludo, and a brave knight named Sir Didymus. She also fights goblins and makes their king fall in love with her before she beats the evil man. She--”

“That’s nice. Keep up, girl,” he interrupted, still not looking at her. “We’ll barely make it to dinner on time.”

She scampered alongside her guardian until they arrived, and Rey bustled upstairs to hide her prized possession. No one asked her about it thankfully, and she hid it under her smelly, lumpy mattress without any prying eyes before washing up for dinner.

Her smile continued into dinner, as everyone finally acknowledged her birthday by allowing her to have first dibs on the food, as well as not stealing any of it, or the seconds she got for once. All chattered amongst themselves, and Rey was bursting to tell someone else about her new book. However, every time she tried, they changed the subject. 

Little by little, her smile dimmed. Her joy and hope were squashed by uncaring, unfeeling children who didn’t give two figs about her, and she kept to herself, imagining what Sarah would say if she was there. Finally, dinner finished, and the long table was abandoned. Rey barely sat up before everyone was gone, talking to each other and completely oblivious to her. 

Yet again, Rey was alone. Forgotten. Ignored. Each little voice of negativity telling her she was nothing clawed at her stomach and chest, screeching and demanding she listen. For a moment, she gave in to the melancholy, and even almost said her favorite catchphrase. However, before she could, she remembered Sarah.

Would Sarah act like this? No! She didn’t let that Goblin King win, and Rey refused to let the kids' win and steal her joy on her birthday. Smile restored to her freckled face, Rey raced upstairs with hope-quickened steps and closed the door to her barren bedroom. The wooden floorboards made high-pitched noises of protest as her stocking feet traipsed across them. After she changed into her sleeveless, blue nightdress, she found her special present and stopped to take in the small desk beside her bed with nothing but a small rose on it. The room and white-washed walls were empty otherwise, and she was forlorn for a moment. However, she kept reminding herself that the room was hers, and that where she stayed now didn’t matter. 

She was going somewhere much better.

The bed bounced as she jumped in and pulled the cotton topsheet over her. There was still enough light outside that she didn’t need to bring out her flashlight from the desk yet, so she escaped to a faraway land, to the new place that she loved most. The cursive words on the thick pages jumped off the page, and the smell of old books was replaced with the smell of chickens and more. 

She didn’t get very far before she said, mostly to herself, “If I’m going to be like Sarah, I need to get better at reading. Be a better student. She reads outside in front of others, and I’m afraid to do that.”

With every page she read, though, courage rushed into her veins, the magic and power she culled from the special book an unexpected boon. By the end, she was breathless, face red and body shaking with excitement.

“I want to be just like Sarah!” She started to close the book as she finished reading with another broad smile on her face...until she thought of the closing paragraph, of the defeated Goblin King that remained outside as Sarah and her new friends celebrated her victory. “What happens to him again?”

She re-opened the novel and skimmed the last few lines. A pang of empathy and sadness hit her like Ludo thudding on top of Hoggle in the Bog of Eternal Stench. This Goblin King, Jareth, was alone. Abandoned by everyone around him for Sarah. He seemed so sad.

A single tear formed at her right eye, and she blinked it away. “I’m sorry you’re alone,” she whispered, touching the page before closing the book and hugging it against her. 

This book was the one thing she could really call her own. She had a sole stuffed doll dressed like a pilot that slept with her that was a hand-me-down from other kids, just like all her holey clothes were that everyone made fun of her for. This book, however, was hers. It was in pristine condition, and she would keep it that way. Likewise, these characters were hers, and they would be the friends she always longed to have.

Including the Goblin King. He didn’t have to be alone since she was there. He could fly to her window and chat with her anytime.

She glanced at the closed window longingly, pressing both of her hands against her precious book. Words have meaning, and now she knew that wishes did. If only the Goblin King knew that she was there. She cleared her throat. “I wish to learn more about the Goblin King.”

It was as though she had stuck her finger in an electrical socket. It reminded her strongly of when she had first touched the magical book, a feeling of weightlessness ricocheting through her before her stomach dropped. Then, the world around her faded to black before dissolving into bright rays of light as she rushed into the tall, extravagant castle of her earlier vision. She seemed to drop from the sky at an alarming rate, each pointed arch and bit of stained glass within the castle’s many windows passing through her vision before she was seemingly standing up, looking off to the right. 

Everything changed when she heard the same voice that had spoken to her in the first vision.  _ “Where are my parents?” _

Her heart ached for the speaker, whom she suspected was a younger Goblin King. She knew all too well what it was to search in vain for missing parents. He sounded miserable, near tears, and she wanted to hug him. She made to, at least until she realized she had no arms or body. When she looked around, she was only able to look down and see leather sandals on large feet -- or at least large feet for someone her age. The speaker moved, so she did.

Was she seeing the Goblin King’s memories? Was that why she had no control?

A new voice entered her consciousness, confirming for her that she was seeing everything through the eyes of the Goblin King. Hearing everything he did. She just wasn’t expecting what came next.

_ “You know very well where they are, Ben.” _ The line of sight shifted up slightly to see a tall, thin male with perfectly straight, blond hair and a kindly face. She hadn’t expected the change in name, but she accepted it as she studied the lanky man. He smiled to try to lessen the blow.  _ “They’re gone, for now. They’re fighting the war against the Unseelie for your grandparents so that you can live in peace. So our kingdom and humankind are always protected.” _

Ben’s gaze fell, and Rey snuck a look at Ben’s lower half, the loose-fitting slacks shimmering whenever he moved. The slate gray was the same for both men, and she found it interesting that both seemed to wear the same thing, down to the sandals. Their legs looked eerily similar, other than Ben’s being smaller, and her gaze next zeroed in on Ben’s clenching and unclenching hands that were encased in white silk. With everything else about them seeming the same, she assumed they’d look the same on top. When Ben’s larger hands lifted and balled into fists, she was distracted from her musings by his pain, how it seemed to pour out of every crevice and pore of his skin.  _ “I don’t care about anyone else! What about me? Aren’t I important to them? I’m their only son! Their future heir!” _ he cried, stomping his foot.

_ “Of course you are. Your safety is of the utmost importance to them, which is why they’re fighting. They’re getting ready to lead the kingdom, and they want to leave this in a good place for you when you’re ready,” _ said the older man, capturing Ben’s attention once more. 

_ “Then what are  _ you _ doing, Uncle Luke? You’re not teaching me,” _ shot back Ben, vibrating with rage and hurt.

_ “I’m helping your parents by coming here briefly. Soon, I’ll be going back to the battlefield to defeat Sidious once and for all. Then, I’ll play with you and teach you all I know,”  _ promised Luke solemnly.

_ “By then it’ll be too late. You’ll have already forgotten me by then,”  _ stated Ben before he stormed away, leaving the wide open space full of long banners and light for a darker hallway.  _ “I am the lost and lonely, always forgotten.” _

When he exited the darkness, he threw out a hand, a crystal bouncing on the flagstone floor and causing the heavy, oak doors to creak open when they collided. He entered a courtyard, feet determined to escape his uncle until he heard childish screams. At that, he stopped moving to gaze at the three seeming children that were running around one another. A slender, ginger boy was being chased by a tall blonde girl in a flowing dress. In the center of them stood a boy with dark, curly hair and a bright smile who happened to glance up then.

_ “Ben! Come join us!” _ he cried, waving at Ben as the other two took notice of him. “ _ We miss you _ !”

Ben’s whole body tensed.  _ “No thanks, Poe. Another time I’d like to watch Armitage get chased by Gwen to demonstrate military strategy. I need...to go study. _ ”

All three gave him pleading looks before Poe said,  _ “Sure. We’re here.” _

Within seconds, they were back to playing, and Ben was forgotten again. He dashed away, taking the spiral steps in the tower two at a time until he skidded into the room, panting lightly. Door closed, he went to his window, where he could see the three continue to play, and Rey felt her stomach knotting up for him. 

Why didn’t they even try to encourage him to stay? Couldn’t they see that he was hurting? Why would they be so heartless?

As the tears tracked down his face, he threw himself onto his bed, sobbing into his pillow. When he stopped crying, he threw up another crystal and screamed for several minutes. He let it pop when he was done. Only then did he sit up weakly in bed, hugging his knees to his chest.

_ “Why does no one love me enough to stay? Why doesn’t anyone care?” _

It was as though he had shot an arrow at the center of her heart, piercing her at her core. He had stolen the words straight from her brain, giving voice to the thoughts that plagued her every night and filled her every nightmare.

Why did no one love her? What had she done wrong? Was she so worthless that no one cared? Would anyone ever care? Was she the only one who wanted to rage about this unfair life?

She was pulled from her shared feelings with him by the sound of his wavering voice, slight and musical as he covered his eyes with his hands as they rested against his knees. _ “A-all of my life I've tried so hard, doing my best with what I had. Nothing much happened all the same.” _

He was singing? Why did he sing? Was that something that all his kind did? Why sing when sad?

She couldn’t dwell on her questions for long, though, because his voice grew stronger as he poured his heart into the song, his face rising to look out upon his luxurious accommodations, rich tapestries and rugs covering the deep mahogany.  _ “Something about me stood apart, a whisper of hope that seemed to fail. Maybe I'm born right out of my time, breaking my life in two.” _

Rey’s heart broke for him all over again, and she listened to him sing a capella. Soon, however, his voice grew further away, and the image of his sumptuous surroundings faded at the edges, until all she could do was hear him sing. The last line she heard him sing before he disappeared entirely gutted her.

_ “Sometimes I cry my heart to sleep.” _

Glitter floated above Rey as she grabbed her pillow and hugged it to her, imagining it was young Ben. The words fell from her lips without thinking, imagining him there. “Nothing prepared me for you, lighting the darkness of my soul.” 

Tears streamed down her face, and she didn’t understand why it hurt so much. When the tears finally stopped, she said quietly, “Don’t worry, Ben. I won’t forget you. I’ll always remember you. I’ll do really well in school so I can read like Sarah and be with you when I say your lines in the park.” She lay her head down against her pillow, eyes fluttering closed as hope blossomed in her chest. “You’ll see.”

\-------------------

As she fell asleep, dulled, whiskey-colored eyes from lack of sleep and too much goblin ale suddenly shot wide open. A broad body sat up straight from lounging in his semicircular throne, and Ben Solo, the newly crowned Goblin King, blinked in confusion. Were his extremely tight pants finally cutting off the blood flow to certain parts of his body?

“What was that?” he asked, peering across the pigsty of his throne room. He stuck his pinkie in his right ear, trying to understand what he just felt and heard. “And where did half of my goblins go?”

They had all been cavorting about not minutes earlier, singing offkey and passing around tankards of ale to stave off the incoming hangover from nearly a day of drinking constantly. Although, according to all the goblins who passed to congratulate him the day before, that was how every goblin holiday went. 

Ben was...less than thrilled by the prospect. The castle had been a bustling mess when he arrived, and their idea of “clean” matched his version of dirty on a good day. No one modulated their high-pitched voice, and they acted like children, impressed by mere parlor tricks and easily distracted by anything shiny.

He was instantly grateful for the lack of grating sounds in his immediate area, but it was still slightly disturbing how half of his goblins just vanished at the same moment that he felt a strange, almost tugging sensation in his consciousness at the same time that he heard a light, tinkling bell ring in his ear. 

“Is it a summons?” he asked, suddenly feeling tired again and slumping into his seat. The gold armrests held him up just barely, and his white poet’s shirt and black vest were open, rubbing against the cloth backing that ran all around his throne. “Is this what a wish feels like? The old man never did describe it,” he mumbled, feeling a headache coming on.

Running a hand through formerly lustrous, raven locks that were flattened by too much dancing and ale being tossed, he groaned and wished they weren’t sticky. He blamed the goblins and all their ale for the drunken haze that he had passed the entire night in. Granted, Armitage had recommended it originally after the previous Goblin King suggested it as a way to win over the simple-minded goblins, so Ben could give those two some of the blame as well, even if he couldn’t really blame them.

He had been the one to drink. He had been the one to trust Snoke and cause all the Seelie to lose their trust in him. This was his punishment, ruling a backwater country, and he wanted to drown his sorrows, under the guise of making his citizens happy. 

He could still hear himself just three days before as he spoke to his parents before leaving Naboo, the home of his family and the seat of the High King and Queen of the Seelie Court.

_ “Why there?” His cold voice was belied by the sorrow in his eyes. “At the edges of our kingdom, the farthest I can be from you. I thought you wanted to get to know me more. I know I must be punished.” _

_ “Because we need you there,” said his mother plainly, her long hair piled high atop her head in a single braid. “The current king is advanced in years, and he doesn’t have much time left. He’s visiting right now, and he agreed weeks ago to train you so you could rule--” _

_ “You were planning this?” interrupted Ben, sincerely surprised. “You wanted me to lead?” _

_ “You need practice, kid,” replied his father gently before ruffling his hair fondly. “This is the perfect way since there’s no war to gain experience.” _

_ Han looked like he had fought in a war. His hair was prematurely gray, and there were more wrinkles appearing on his face. He didn’t move as quickly as he used to, but he still looked like a commoner turned king in his fitted linens without much decoration. _

_ His wife, Leia, was the true queen and ruler. She looked the part with her fine, elegant gowns of silk and taffeta, wearing the richest colors that could be afforded. She always wore at least a circlet on her head to signify her rank, and she had a matching one created for her husband which he wore for her.  _

_ “Why there?” asked Ben, looking between them. “What’s so important about that backwater that no one ever talks about?” _

_ “Your kingdom is the first line of defense for entering our realm. It must be protected and led by someone loyal to us, and you’ve proven that plenty,” said Leia, taking his right hand. “We believe you’re ready for this, and soon, you’ll prove to the entire kingdom that you’re loyal and ready to lead here.” _

_ “Besides, the goblins are the scariest warriors, based on the stories I’ve heard from soldiers who crossed them,” said Han, patting Ben’s left shoulder. “You’ll be safe from any fae who wants revenge on you, protected by distance and goblins.” _

_ The way they talked, they almost made it sound appealing. However, he was still hesitant. “This king will tell me everything I need to know?” _

_ His parents nodded eagerly, his mother coming forward to embrace him. “Yes. Thank you. This means the world to me. I wish you were closer...there’s so much I’ve missed and want to make up for.” _

_ “There’s time yet,” insisted Ben, hugging her close. “We’ll visit one another, officially or via owl. Correspond. Or find a way to use magic to our advantage.” _

_ “With the lessening of magic throughout the fae, that’s highly unlikely,” replied Leia, pulling away, “even if I’d like it. If anyone can find a way, it’s you. The magic is strongest in your new kingdom. I don’t understand how or why, but it is.” _

_ “I’ll figure it out,” he replied with surety. He placed a gloved fist in his palm, tensing as he accepted his fate. _

_ “Perhaps you’ll also learn to like and respect humans since you’ll be dealing with them regularly,” suggested Han before pulling out a necklace with a golden pair of dice on it, handing them to his son. “May this bring you luck in your dealings with all. You know we value all life, and we don’t want you to be ambivalent toward them anymore.” _

_ Ben glared at both of them. “At least you told me the truth this time.” _

_ His mother gave no indication of guilt or feeling bad; she simply nodded. Han shrugged. “You deserve that after all you’ve done. Chewie’s also accompanying you to the Goblin Kingdom. Should you need to send anything personally, he’ll do it, as well as help advise you in any way you need. He’s been by my side since the beginning, just as those three who are going with you now.” _

_ A lump developed in Ben’s throat that his father would willingly part with his lucky dice and lifelong friend like this for him. “Thank you.” _

That conversation had unsettled Ben far more than the one with the Goblin King. Old Mace Windu had had a quiet reign, and he didn’t mince words about what Ben ought to do: run the Labyrinth to become the legitimate king, throw holidays regularly to appease the goblins, and threaten to bog them if they misbehaved. He went into some detail of what to do when someone wished away someone, and how to deal with the runner and wished away. 

What he had never mentioned was what the summons felt like. Whatever Ben had just experienced, it felt as though someone had siphoned off some of his magic, as he had felt worn out as he always did after performing magic-intensive spells. 

If it was a summons, though, shouldn’t he have heard the wish and had someone to visit and take?

His brain hurt from the sheer amount of thinking that he attempted to do while severely hungover. He regretted yet again his decision to celebrate as soon as Chewie, Armitage, Gwen, and Poe arrived. Mace crowned him king before taking off as an owl, and goblin ale flooded the streets with how much everyone drank.

Ben turned his gaze to Armitage, who was standing in a corner and pinching his large, bulbous nose. Ben still wasn’t used to seeing him as a dwarf with dark skin and the ginger hair that always made him recognizable. Sitting up, Ben beckoned him forward with a nod. When he was close, Ben asked, “Do you regret encouraging me to throw that party to win the loyalty of my subjects yet?”

Armitage’s face remained neutral and detached. “No. I barely drank compared to you, Your Highness. You drank even Chewbacca under the table.” Even in a much smaller body, he still had his same voice. 

Ben smirked, flexing his black leather gloves. “He also didn’t attend Unseelie parties and develop a tolerance like we did, did he? And the rest of you are too small right now to challenge me,” he allowed. 

“Indeed,” replied Armitage, raising a bushy, red eyebrow. “Though you still look terrible. Do you want a healer to create something for that headache and hangover?”

“The healers here can do that?” asked Ben, doing a double-take. When Armitage grinned, Ben knew that Armitage had already begun his work of worming into the kingdom and discovering all its secrets. “Did you already acquire one?”

He smiled and revealed an empty vial. “Yes. I refused to tell Poe how I acquired it, though. Don’t tell him.”

Ben’s chuckle echoed in the throne room as he summoned a goblin and ordered the healer to be brought to him. “Still angry that he called you a fun-sized fae?”

Armitage’s brown hands balled into fists. “He doesn’t have room to talk! He’s a tiny dog! BeeBee is a bigger dog than him now. Poor horse deserved better than to become a white and orange, fluffy dog.”

Ben glanced at the friend in question as he stumbled into the room. “You think Poe looks like a dog? I thought he was a fox with that face and fluffy tail.”

Poe grimaced before approaching them, his tiny clothes and feathered hat askew.

“Dog, fox, no matter,” grumbled Armitage, waving the nervous healer forward. “I could still easily throw him, and he couldn’t even pick me up!”

“Oh yeah! Let’s see it! I’ll fight you here and now, little dwarf!” cried Poe angrily, all the goblins immediately appearing to pick sides in a fight.

Ben resisted the urge to roll his eyes and requested a healing draught for a hangover quietly from the healer. When he turned back, the pair were standing defensively in the center of a large circle of goblins who all clutched ale or chickens to watch with eager eyes. The tiny fox-dog barked like a pomeranian, baring his teeth at the squat dwarf who kept calling him a mutt. 

“This is the most exciting day since the last king decreed we could have porgs instead of chickens,” said one goblin close to Ben, who shook his head as he took note of the porgs at the edges of the room, creating large nests using sticks, lost items, and feathers of all sorts.

Ben still didn’t understand why the porgs were there. Why were the black chickens so feared that Mace allowed porgs to be kept as pets? Why was he even worrying about the pets that the goblins kept? Was this what he had to look forward to every day that he ruled? Was this why Mace had been eager to get rid of his post? 

“Enough!” cried Ben, arms going out and cringing at how loud he was. His ears weren’t ready for this volume yet. “There’s no point in fighting when one is drunk and the other isn’t, even if it would even the odds.” He smirked at Armitage, who scowled at the jab about his hand-to-hand combat skills.

Armitage was excellent with a blade or bow and arrow, just like Poe, but Armitage didn’t roll around in the mud and fight like Gwen, Poe, and Ben had enjoyed doing as kids. He preferred to be the objective third party and judging everything, or else working behind the scenes.

In that respect, Ben highly valued him. Armitage was very loyal and his best friend, even if he had led Ben astray with Snoke. Poe, on the other hand, was always looking for a fight or else was trying to woo the ladies with his endless charm. He could make anyone like him, and Ben appreciated that about him. Where he hated most beings, Poe liked everyone universally and believed strongly in Ben’s parents and way of ruling.

“Later, buddy,” insisted Poe, anger washing away as he slapped Armitage’s back. “I still would’ve beat you.”

“You’ll never know,” sniffed Armitage, going to some of the castle staff.

“Great party, Solo!” cried Poe, his tail wagging eagerly. “I loved it. You really shined last night, singing and dancing on top of those tables.”

“Don’t remind me.” Ben closed his eyes briefly at how he was encouraged by the goblins and his friend to dance along with his singing since he was considered the best dancer at court. He did it to show off for the goblins, but then he got too into it the more he drank. “Where are you headed now?”

“To find Chewie. I heard him earlier calling some rocks outside and left because he was too loud,” said Poe, trotting toward the door on his hind legs.

“I don’t blame you. Good luck. Bring him here,” requested Ben, relieved when his friend agreed without a second thought and left out the back entrance. 

Ben wasn’t sure how all his friends would feel about being chained to his side in the middle of nowhere by a curse, but none of them seemed to mind so far. He suspected they were glad to escape the humiliation of being seen as anything other than their normal selves.

He got lost in his musings temporarily, at least until the front doors slammed open, revealing one of the Praetorian guards that used to protect Snoke. With a long blade at the ready, he screamed for revenge, and Ben wasn’t ready to fight in his current state. However, he stood up, hoping that the goblins would prove themselves to be good fighters so he didn’t have to intervene.

That didn’t happen.

The guard dressed entirely in red took two steps and swung forward, attacking the nearest goblins. “You will pay for your betrayal of the true king! Your whole kingdom will, starting with your friends and family!”

Ben’s anger simmered, and he was relieved for a brief second when multiple goblins jumped the guard, only to be kicked away easily. That was when Ben knew that he would have to protect the little, incompetent things. When one goblin received a large gash and cried out in pain, Ben snapped into action, taking his kingly duty and the threat to those he loved seriously. “Never!”

His ground-eating steps allowed him to meet the guard within a minute, throwing a crystal at him to make his sword disappear just before it killed one of his goblins. The guard almost fell to the ground but caught himself just in time, glaring at Ben as the missing blade appeared in the king’s hand. 

“Looking for this?” asked Ben casually, almost bored as he switched the weapon between his hands. “You’re too easy. Give up now, and I’ll let you live.”

“Death first,” returned the faceless guard, scuffing his feet on the stone floor to be ready to attack. “I’ll--hey, that’s my head! What’s going on?”

Ben didn’t think, only react. Where Snoke’s death was drawn-out and more painful, he made this one’s death swift, cutting off his head with one powerful strike. He smiled with Unseelie glee as the head dropped, only to remain frozen mid-air when the goblins all ooh’d and ahh’d at the novelty.

“Can we play with it?” asked one goblin wearing an oven mitt on his head, giving wide, pleading eyes to Ben.

“Play with what? The head? The guard?” asked Ben, looking between them, not quite understanding.

“Can we have both? Please?” asked the same goblin. “We love toys.”

Ben shrugged, reminiscent of his father. “Sure, if you want to--”

The whole slew of goblins around him cheered as the head floated up in the air like a balloon, the guard crying out and not understanding why he was still alive. For that matter, Ben wasn’t sure why the guard still lived, at least until he saw the way the goblins played keep away with the red fae, using his head as the ball in question. The headless body wandered around from goblin to goblin, trying to take back his head, and all the goblins cried with delight, loving their new game and toy.

Ben was amused and happy for them. If it brought them joy, he didn’t care. The guard was harmless now.

“I don’t believe my eyes,” said Armitage, finally appearing. “I saw it all happen, and I still don’t believe it. That was one of the most feared guards of the Unseelie Court, reduced to nothing by you within seconds, and now he has a disembodied head that’s a toy to these uncouth wretches. Just what are these goblins?”

“Very powerful with magic, clearly,” said Ben quietly. “They’re allowing him to live, if only to play with him. They have a strange sense of humor, but it works to our advantage.”

“Why?” asked Armitage, stepping behind Ben to avoid being hit by the helmeted head that everyone was passing around like a hot potato.

“Because they’re fearless in that respect. That playfulness has a dark edge that we can use to scare everyone who dares threaten us. They’re useless in battle otherwise,” explained Ben, smiling when Armitage’s eyes lit up.

“Of course. The other guards will come and be frightened at what fate befell their fellow guard. The news will spread of how fearsome they are, how they drove this first one crazy, and you’ll be lauded as skilled for killing him.”

“Exactly. You’re rubbing off on me, old friend,” said Ben, patting Armitage’s shoulder. “Let’s leave them alone and let them have their fun.”

“They’re like cats as they play with their food. Let’s hope they can be trained for battle by Gwen and myself,” said Armitage with a shake of his head before glancing down at Ben’s gloved hand. “Do you think the royal tailor could make me better clothes than these ill-fitted things found before we left? I feel so uncultured in these rags.”

Considering that Armitage used to be one of the best-dressed men at court and was now wearing tattered children’s clothing from a servant, Ben was sure he did. He signaled another servant. “Of course. All three of you could use new clothes after that curse. I suppose that’s what the goblins have done to this guard now by letting him live...we’ll have to find a place to keep all the guards who come and get cursed.”

“How about the Fire Forest?” suggested Armitage, pulling out writing utensils. “Given how easily he got in, we should also put up more fortifications around our castle and kingdom’s borders. Do you think Chewie would ask the rocks to move where we request?”

“There’s no harm in asking,” agreed Ben, going to his throne. 

A smaller goblin wearing a holey vest bowed before Ben. “Thank you for the new plaything, Your Highness.”

“You’re welcome.” Ben recognized this one and leaned in. “Did he hurt you when he kicked you?”

The goblin blinked momentarily in confusion. “Hurt me? I loved it when he kicked me,” said the goblin with a smile on his face. “The old king used to kick us for fun. It was our favorite pastime besides catapulting chickens into the air and seeing how far they would go.”

Ben decided to give up on ever understanding why the goblins did what they did. “So you  _ want  _ me to kick you?”

The goblin jumped gleefully and presented his backside. “If you would.”

Ben groaned, “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

The dwarf grinned at the absurdities that just kept coming. “Nor I, but your subjects demand it. This should be entertaining. I bet you’ll have many more takers for kicking once they see how strong you are,” observed Armitage, shaking his head as Ben stood and stared at the goblin with uncertainty. “The sooner you do it, the better.”

Ben half-heartedly kicked the goblin, and the little guy sailed into the air, holding out his arms. “First kick! First kick!”

The guard was forgotten instantly as all eyes landed on the flying goblin. As soon as he plopped to the ground, the whole crowd stampeded toward Ben, begging for their turn to do so.

Ben’s eyes rose to the high ceiling. “You were right. What have I done?” he bemoaned, not expecting so many to want this.

“Found a way to give both your legs a workout, I believe,” commented Armitage with amusement. “Perhaps they’ll let you lift them, too, since you developed a taste for it from those giants in Snoke’s court.”

“This is why you’re my second-in-command,” said Ben with interest, signaling for his subjects to quiet down. “You’re full of good ideas, and you’ve been here all of a day.”

Armitage bowed. “Thank you, Your Highness. I wish to serve you, regardless of this curse. Not many would remember me as you have. The ride here was easy, even if I’m still surprised you managed to fly here and defeat the Labyrinth in the time it took me to get here.”

“It’s a clever setup, but not impossible.” Ben sat again as he felt tired once more. “I’m more exhausted today from fighting and using magic.”

“That’s normal, though,” said Armitage, turning to face him. “All magic use drains us.”

“I know. When we get bored here, we’ll have to dive into the source of magic in this place, which I’m sure will be soon,” said Ben, kicking the closest goblin without further ado. “There’s not much to do otherwise.”

“Just wait until the runners appear! They’re great!” cried an older goblin wearing a pendant with a blue butterfly on it. “They’re fun to toy with.”

Ben turned to a smirking Armitage. “I imagine you’ll enjoy that, too.”

“I will. I’m not convinced yet that humans are superior. They’re weak, barbaric, and without magic,” scoffed Armitage, motioning forward the healer. 

“Perhaps we’ll be surprised yet by them, just as the goblins have surprised us,” said Ben thoughtfully, kicking another goblin. “Or so I hope.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Also, look at this AMAZING moodboard that [automatic_badgirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/automatic_badgirl/pseuds/automatic_badgirl) created for the fic!! I LOVE it sooooo much!


End file.
